Ed scissor tongue.

you pretentious fuck. what are you fucking banging on about. you should be banned from this blog. fuck off back to the imaginary rose garden in that chorus you wrote in that gay bar with the balcony.

left handed vegetarian.

LEVIATHAN

Sincerely lost - an animal that stalks the bars of a rusty cage booth cotch
Underneath the moss heap a sparkling sediment embossed

Weaving black widow messages - deceiving seasons screen the truth behind the whistles
A landlubber - a great decree - languishing in laughter - isolated editors bash buttons on enigma machines
The wail of banshee boardwalks inside the tap dancer's dungeon orchestrate the climbing of white willow trees under a full moon fulcrum

But how long will this last?

Without a hope in the widest of worlds the human fly climbs higher than a sky rocket made of stone to build his home
A place where carrier pigeons battle storks to deliver good news to the waiting populous below

Twiddling thumbs through the light shards of Avalon - a main frame epitaph that radiates the rain clouds active

The night stars converse with the space rubbish

A man on his knees tries to fathom the warmth that he feels in his heart
The words that ignite the coals of his being burn with more passion than the patterns of a life long activist

The revolution dances on his finger tips televised - his finger tips glow monotone - dabbling with chaos - and as the minutes start to blossom lost the channel hopping overflows

Staring at a ceefax test card

IF YOU ARE NOT LEFT HANDED...

THEN I HAVE VERY LITTLE RESPECT FOR YOU.

TRUE SAY!

Mr. Melonskin: "Oi pete bruv, would you rather fuck a dead pig or a dead woman?"

Pete decibel: "Dead pigs got more tits"

Mr. Melonskin: "True say, true say"

THE WEATHERMAN

The World spins out of time

Elliptical games of snakes and ladders brandish jokers in every flop

An onlooker stares



Wishful thinking - dream like conclaves - from someone who simply cannot find the words to write his bilingual requiems



Thomas taps a forceful source - and strides the high wire vacant - he ponders thoughts like cosmonauts - bending the universe



Each word scribed like gravestone inscriptions - embossed into dusty memories - the trench foot forager falls deeper than harpoon struck anenomies and settles like the morning frost



You have no power over me

A wonderful moment disappears from the front line of everything gracious that I hold in my heart

The palpitations burn forcefields between the portals - a tangent universe reflects what I've lost



The philosophy of time travel

JAM BAXTER'S CRYING BABY OF THE WEEK

I'm torn between this one..

and this one..

Fuck... this one too... theres too many...

IF YOU CANNOT FREESTYLE ON DRUM AND BASS FOR AT LEAST AN HOUR STRAIGHT....

THEN I HAVE NO RESPECT FOR YOU.

Should this be part of the National Curriculum?

This whole street drumming thing is far too alien in my opinion. Why oh why does this not happen on every street corner in every city EVERYWHERE?

There is some old twat in Cambridge city centre who does the whole one man band thing with a border collie sat on a chair howling all day and looking well miserable, but I would swap him for any one of these drummer mans in the blink of an eye. Imagine spotting one of these dudes on the market square hammering the shit into a sulo bin.

Cyphering potential = endless.

ED SCISSORTONGUE'S TRACK OF THE WEEK

Has there ever been a verse written in the belly of the history of wordplay as dope as Mr Monch's on this track? seriously though? From the efforts of the Insane Clown Posse to the sonnets of William Shakespeare to whoever wrote the G-O-D verses for the Sister Act 2 script - can anyone front on that verse?

I rekkers NO...

FUCK THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blu - presents - MOTU

As all mans are already aware, the smoke my beef blog is fundamentally a place for people to meet, discuss, peruse and fondle different shaped and textured meat products. Bloody, medium-rare or plain crucified, this blog invites meat related contributions of all shapes and sizes. Most significantly, this blog is designed to strengthen the already iron-clad links between meat product appreciation and the 4 elements of hip hop. As a sub-basement, under the underground movement which has been bubbling like t-bone steaks in the kitchens of any self respecting humanoid, and taken to new heights by the SMB gang, we all know that a freestyle cypher, b-boy circle or train yard invasion is best complemented by a sizzling George Foreman soundtrack.

Just to emphasise this point, here is a fine picture of a fucking massive steak being eaten by a rapper.



Now - I know that it is good to be open and honest about things and as I see it this blog is as good a place as any to keep it incredibly real. Both myself and my Contact Play goons decided to keep this on the downlow as we knew that it would result in mass riots, accusations of being fucking frauds and would ultimately result in no respect being given to us on any level of the game from the moment that this information leaked. The trouble is, I just cannot go on any longer with this burden on my shoulder plates.

I hate to say it world, but the time has come to announce that Edward Scissortongue is a vegetarian.

Just to take the edge off this devastating revelation I would also like to announce that fellow CP member Mr Key used to keep it extremely herbivorous. However, Mr Key knew that in order to roll deeper than batcaves within the SMB ranks he was going to have to sizzle more bacon at some point in his life. To cut a long story short, Mr Key's new best mate is his local butcher.

Beef Wellington was born...

As a result of this confession I have taken it upon myself to inject new life into this dripping blog. Mans can talk about meats all they like, but I have to be true to myself and mouth off about some other shit true to my heart and incredibly open arteries. For example, nang Scalextrix whips, different types of cake, poetry jams frequented by vietnamese midgets and David Hasselhoff's musical career in Bavaria.

So, without further ado, here is Bologna born street artist Blu's next level, groundbreaking animation 'Motu'. This piece of work is fucking huge and I bet most mans have seen it before, but, if anyone has missed the net then here it is.

MESSY

Plucked from a forgotten time when you could actually wear just a t-shirt outside, this video is actually a massive uncontrollable pile of jokes. Old as fuck but definitely worth a second watch. I just watched it and both laughed and cringed in equal measure.

Dirty aint so dirty!!! i should of pissed on her.

After getting completely parred in public by this girl i was trying to impress by threatening to piss on her in the smoking area of lakota, she fucking rinsed me in this song she wrote and sung about the entire situation. i know people like hearing girls ripping the piss out of me so here you go. its the first song on her page titled "Dirty aint so dirty"

www.myspace.com/ameliahorne

A SOUND PHILOSOPHY

The most Useless Machine Ever (with instructions)...

Want to build one? Have nothing better to do?

http://www.instructables.com/id/The-Most-Useless-Machine/

Lost & ffffound

If you pick an image that interests you on the homepage of www.ffffound.com and then subsequently click another image linked to the image you first chose you can construct a completely random image chain in a similar fashion to this...

The Dead Flag Blues

'Godspeed You Black Emporer' are a post rock band that hail from Quebec. I cannot describe how nang this band are. They make instrumental tunes (most of the time) but occasionally smack some lyrics into the core of their existentialisms. The passage below is taken from the opening track of their second studio release 'F♯A♯∞'. If anyone can find a passage of words that are doper than this then I would very much like to hear/read/think and see them NOW!!!!!!!!!!

THE DEAD FLAG BLUES INTRO...

The car's on fire and there's no driver at the wheel
and the sewers are all muddied with a thousand lonely suicides
and a dark wind blows
the government is corrupt
and we're on so many drugs
with the radio on and the curtains drawn

we're trapped in the belly of this horrible machine
and the machine is bleeding to death

the sun has fallen down
and the billboards are all leering
and the flags are all dead at the top of their poles

it went like this:

the buildings tumbled in on themselves
mothers clutching babies picked through the rubble
and pulled out their hair

the skyline was beautiful on fire
all twisted metal stretching upwards
everything washed in a thin orange haze

i said: "kiss me, you're beautiful -
these are truly the last days"

you grabbed my hand and we fell into it
like a daydream or a fever

we woke up one morning and fell a little further down -
for sure it's the valley of death

i open up my wallet
and it's full of blood

New cover art from sexy man bloke BIG TAM aka MR SORN.

"ADR001 Hosts BMK's 'Twilight' as its first release with a stunning remix by the king of soulful Drum and Bass 'Utah Jazz'. This track has been supported by Grooverider, Fabio, Dan Marshall and D-Code to name a few and looks set to be a smash early 2010. BMK is an upcoming producer who has had releases on many other labels and is set to be a rising star for 2010. With the backing of Utah Jazz on this formidable release, it has set the scene for Audio Danger Records."

Out next month on Audio Danger Records
Check them bad boys out, they dangerous. I ain't lying.

S P R O U T S

Papercuts – inkspills vibes over subject matter
tic-a-tape remnances represent his last attempt
head nod copperpot - pen cracks page on a beat pattern boom bap
sounding out his avenues - gun turret echo hammer

Attempts to tap into cerebrals – rust covered armour creak - Fighting for lines in a likely story
The trouble is a lifetime of level ups levelheadedness and heavy stress - abacus additions - insomnia gameshows and light spangled etiquette

I consume mind numbing compounds
periodic table snot fodder white collar worker snout candy at the same very time as attempting to indulge my database enter data in a stormcloud of energy
If you could see me now – 7 hours later with a 16 bar monologue coughing up the same old subject matter jargon at a heap of pretenders bent backwards - you would probably on first listen rate me a lost soul wickerman flaming like a rocket pack tickling odder days and occasions.

Autobiographical ensembles – a selection of moments in time frozen - nothing more or less
Steeplechasing punchlines that wind me up
Formulas for now - these tethers these streets these storm ravaged wind snapping lives bruised and battered
I speak and shuffle letterforms for the smacked up muddy souled pie charts facts and figures skeletal
A heart palpitation short of the rigormort.

Cause that's entertainment even though its not entertaining to see a man put his soul into the pattern matter even if the patterns matter not - I still step to stuff like a fairground powercut - plotting to shoot down in flames the way in which your brain breathes in and out.

We are the world champions of nothing
Man made moon matter sprinkled on your sundaes
Scissortongue – ghost ship lieutenant – dancing on your front lawn – grave digging death linen.

The last few years vaguely summed up by a selection of pictures.

Henry Giles House

Since the sun no longer boasts its talents on the skymaps of my synapse
alive in nightime residues I blink in silent dorms
despite the fact that silence traps the air inside my thunderlungs
my hearts neighbour winces at signposts to the cellar door
Born in a refrain and led by the windsweep
I walk among the tidal waves and flying plagues of locusts
Mr rickshaw – a thousand tonnes of bricks my only customer
a haiku handshake short of everything I thought I knew before
We are the last few long forgotten – time capsule time lapses gone rotten and lost
but the harvest did not visit this annum - a pillage fest
lacerated pages shimmer and shine on these riverbank cypher spots
So I harvest the hardship and carve cast iron dark armies out of sandcastle mush
see its part of the bargain to grapple right angles and tarnish them up - why?
Because the world is not martian enough

To forgive is to forget the things that matter the most

A Jupiter Film Production

I Emerge From The Stars (Kiss my Spaceship Girl)

When Kerem isn't churning out rinsing beats for CP, he spends his time covered in glitter and autotune making intergalactic extra-terrestrial sleaze based on real life chirpsing experience. I think this is going to be a bonus track on the 'Moist Fraff' 80s soul remix album of Champion Fraff which will be up for free download once we're convinced everyone's sick of the original version. This run of blogging form is spectacular.

JAM BAXTER'S CRYING BABY OF THE WEEK

This one, this one right here.

Blowfly

Clarence Reid great songwriter in his own right, but more importantly known as Blowfly. Miles ahead of the game in the 80s. Peep game motherfuckers.


He was also responsible for writing one of my favorite funk tunes. Take note ladies and fix your game up. A blowjob everymorning is a good start, then you're playing for keeps.

Fliptrix - He Who Dares - Video

Fliptrix is releasing his sophomore album in March 'Theory Of Rhyme' on his own label High Focus Records, featuring assorted brehs including myself. Do a purchase. This video's heavy. It's all about the stop motion steez and the liberal distribution of cornflakes 'pon de ground.

RONNIE BOSH'S NEW JACK OF THE WEEK

ED SCISSORTONGUE'S TRACK OF THE WEEK

Royce and Busta murdering up the rhyme schemes...

Contact Play on Soundcloud.

The rather unrelenting Scissortongue assault on the smokemyblogspot shows no sign of slowing up anytime soon...

Even though it does pretty much exactly the same thing as MySpace, just arguably in a far more streamlined and aesthetically pleasing fashion, I thought it was about time that CP got involved with the Soundcloud ponce-fest. I am slightly worried that one of the GANG will call to tell me that I have just created the second (or even third) CP Soundcloud page, however, my searches didn't bear much fraff chatting fruit and so I got involved.

Here is the link to my activities thusfar on this lowly Sunday - LOOK AT THE SOUNDWAVES YO!!!!!!!!!!!

http://soundcloud.com/contact-play-smb

Posse Cut.